Mixed feelings

These thought trains are captured in the gap of an hour...

Dear Woe, Tell me, why do you follow me?
Haven't I been optimistic enough?
Haven't I struggled and achieved things that all thought I would never even attempt?
Haven't I "exceeded expectations and set new benchmarks"?

But still it seems that pranks are always played on me...
The smart Reshmi is always the one whose heart is going to be targeted, hit and broken...
Why did I take up so much responsibility (and that too willingly!)?
Why couldn't I be a little selfish?
Why do I ask myself all these "whys" after things flop big time?
Why do I always justify everyone else and find that finger needs to be pointed always @ me? (every time!)

I am only 25 years. Am I more mature than my age?
Am I capable of doing more than my peers?
Does being a wife and mother mean that I am a daughter any longer?

Why times change?
Why distress comes?
Why anger and revenge?
Why meanness?

Why not gratitude?
Why not regard and respect?
Why not understanding?

Sentiment is a stupid cloud that is hovering over my head now. I thought a rain of tears would do me fine. But then I forgot that this is monsoon, and "Sentiment" clouds are spreading on the sky after every rain.

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Dear Little Buds, you have blossomed. Its no longer your safe zone on the stem, nourished by the parent plant. This is your test for you are going to be a part of a bouquet. Be fresh and smart so that you make way to the finest and rarest of bouquets. You have got it in you to make a mark and secure your place and identity on the bouquet. The bouquet has to be valued and remembered for you.

I quote " Go kiss the world. Good luck and Godspeed."

The happy smiley is addressed to Punnan and Kunju as they step out to their next moves.

1 comments:

Maddy 1:03 AM  

interesting set of musings...cheer up..the big bad happy sad world is beckoning out yonder!!